I Will Love Fiercely Like You Did

When our family moved to Odessa, a little over a decade ago, there was a small group of Mommas who immediately welcomed me into their fold. And

Heather Palmer was one of them. It became apparent very quickly that not only did Bryce and Gavin have many of the same interests and passions, but that Heather and I did too.

We both were seriously obsessed with sports, deep work ethic, and leading people.

We both had a mass of kids, going in all directions, participating in everything.

We both were advancing in our careers and dedicated to working with people on a deep level.

Sometimes, it’s difficult to find someone to connect with in so many ways but our conversations, though usually during a sporting event, booster club meeting, or stop in the neighborhood, were always deep and rich and full because of these commonalities.

Heather, You are the one momma I’ve known through the years who’s as passionate about wrestling as I am and you actually understand it too.

You are the Momma who understands how to balance the impactful career with the dearth of children. You are the Momma who would remind me about self care. You understood the mental stresses of motherhood and career and you would communicate those to me when I needed a refresher.

Selfishly, I still need these things.

I need for you to be sitting a row down in the football stands so we can high five when we score.

I need to you be there as Bryce and Gavin work together to make their tackles.

I need you to be a text away as we go through this crazy senior year together.

I need you to be there when we think about what all the boys have done and get weepy cause it’s their last year and it’s almost over.

I need you to be at all the meetings we face together and be the person that I lock eyes with...and I know that you know exactly what I’m thinking cause you’re thinking the very same thing.

I need to see you a couple rows up at Mizzou Arena when Bryce wins that state championship I know he’s gonna win this year, and then I’ll run up and hug you and cry cause we are so freaking proud!

I need you to be there when I walk around the neighborhood and I get to the top and you’re outside just getting home from another crazy long day of leading your nurses and we talk and we talk and we talk about anything and everything. We talk school and hospital, but mostly sports and Bryce and Gavin and how they’re seniors and it’s gone too fast.

I need you to talk me down when I ask your advice about someone or something.

I need to see the way your eyes light up every time you talk about your kids.

I need to see how proud you’re gonna be when Bryce decides where he’s going to school and he signs with someone.

I need to celebrate all these lasts with you and then watch our boys walk across that stage in May.

I feel like it’s not even fair for me to be so heartbroken and need you so much when I know your family and closest friends must be dying inside.

But that’s how you were.

You made each one of us feel so very important and now the loss of that great compassion and love you had for us cuts so deeply.

So all I can do is promise you that I will keep loving my kids so fiercely like you did. I will cheer your kids on just like you did mine. I will keep leading my staff with compassion like you did. I will take care of myself and take time for myself like you told me to. I promise I will be the best version I can be.

And if any Mommas are new to the scene, I’ll be sure to welcome them with open arms, just like you did.

Love you Lady.